I just want to give up!

Okay I was debating writing this but you know when something is really bothering you all you want to do is write it, well that is me. But I hate writing and love typing so I am going to write this and if it is TMI (too much information) then you can just stop reading it. Okay, deal?

So, I went back to the Doctor (GYN) today for a follow up about the issue I been having for the last six month but epically the last month and half. Well, for me all I did the whole appointment is cry my eyes out, yes you heard me is cry. I sat there in the room and then in his office crying my eyes out that I just don't know what to do anymore. I even told the doctor that I just want to give up and have a Hysterectomy done cause I am tried of everything. He told me he know I did not mean that and am just having trouble with an hormonal imbalance which he says is why I am and been so emotional and crying so much about this. That is when I found out that this crying might be because of the Birth Control because he told me he has me on the highest dose of Birth control in a pill there is. Wow!
So anyways, he think there is a chance for something seriously so wants me to do a Econometrics Biopsy. He said he just wants to check for cancer or anything else. So he decide with the emotions I was already having it might be best to reschedule the appointment and try the biopsy at another time and when i have someone available to drive me home just incase i have any pain and also i could take something before the biopsy to help with the pain. So there is one ideal! So I go on the 20th (I think) to have this done. So if it comes up yes it might be something serious but at least I would know what the problem is. But if it comes up negative, good nothing serious, but we are right back at step one.
But hopefully maybe my period will go back to normal on its on and all this will end. But if not then you wants me to try strong birth control method other then the pill. This is what got me really upset. I always said I NEVER wanted to take any birth control. Don't know why just always said that. But now I feel like I being force to TAKE birth control even when I WANT to get pregnant. I just don't know anymore. The pill was okay I take it get my hormoes somewhat normal again and then go off when Jeremy comes home, but not if I try these other things some kind of Nuveau Ring (don't know if I spelled it right) or a IUD. I don't want them and I think he could tell I did not want them and keep telling me that would be the best thing or if not that. It is going on to other stuff that will make it unable to have a baby.

So yeah I very emotional day for me. I don't know what to do anymore. I am hoping that everything will work out and I will have the Biopsy and everything will be negative and that maybe with weight loss maybe my body will start being normal. LOL!

Anyways sorry I feel better now! Sorry might have been too much information but I had to get it off my chest!